Showing posts with label Introspection. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Introspection. Show all posts

Thursday, November 17, 2011

NaBloPoMo #17 - Grandma's Pudding Dishes

(c) 2011 Ms. Huis Herself at musenmutter.blogspot.com

When I was in high school, I was in a LOT of extracurriculars.  It was a very small school, serving a primarily rural area plus two town of under 500 each.  Class sizes ranged from about 11 to the big class which had maybe 26?  High school meant grades 7-12, and a lot of kids were in a lot of programs - it was common to be in sports and the arts and band and student government - or at least 2 or 3 of the four.

I mentioned the ruralness, right?  You'd think extracurricular commitments after school would be a transportation problem, but they weren't.  Not really.  You see, the younger kids would catch rides from the older kids in their neighborhood.  Whoever was in the same play or at the same practice or whatever would just bring you home.  And then when YOU started driving, you were expected to do the same for your younger neighbors.  That's just how it worked. 

Wednesdays were a bit different, at least for us.  Wednesdays were traditionally reserved for "church night."  The Lutheran churches and the Catholic church and the Reformed churches (just Reformed AND Christian Reformed) and everybody had catechism or church school or confirmation classes or whatever it was called on Wednesday night.  There might be practice right after school, but no games or special events were scheduled Wednesday evenings.

That meant many Wednesday evenings my year-and-a-half-younger brother and I would be in our hometown for practice until 4:30 or 5, and then need to be back by 7 for catechism and choir practice.  Rather than get run home, eat, and run back in to town, Mom & Dad decided we'd stay in town at have supper with Grandma and Grandpa.

So on Wednesdays we'd have play rehearsal or sports practice or whatever, then walk down the hill and over a few blocks across town (it's a SMALL town) to my dad's parents' home.  We'd have supper with them, watch the Wheel of Fortune (they ALWAYS watched Wheel of Fortune), then walk a few blocks back across town to church.

Several things about those suppers stand out in my memory.  Grandma saying the before meal prayer in her special gruff praying voice.  (Why, I don't know, but she always did.  Grandpa took a turn sometimes, but it's her voice that sticks in my memory.)  Her meatball-shaped hamburgers, served on buttered buns without ketchup.  But especially her desserts.

We didn't have desserts regularly with our suppers at home, but Grandma ALWAYS did.  I say, "desserts," but really there were only a couple variations on a theme.  Either it was jello or pudding, made in individual serving dishes, served with a dollop of Cool Whip on top.  Not just any dishes, either, but these dainty white ripply-sided dishes, with a thin rim of gold around the top.  Every Wednesday supper.


My grandma is now 94, soon to turn 95 on Christmas Day.  Her health isn't what it once was, but until this summer she was living on her own, in an apartment in our hometown.  She had a bit of a decline, which led to a brief stay in hospice, but she improved enough it wasn't the right choice for her anymore.  So the decision was made for her to move into a nursing home/assisted living situation in a nearby town, in the same facility as some of her friends.

Before her children gathered to move her and her things into her new room, Grandma's extended family was asked if there was anything we wanted that she didn't need anymore. Some specific items were mentioned, especially furniture for some of the college-age/just-starting-out grandkids and greatgrandkids.  I said I'd like her sewing machine if nobody else wanted it, but that wasn't the real treasure I ended up with.

You see, I asked for the pudding cups.

Tuesday, November 08, 2011

NaBloPoMo #8 - Maybe I AM becoming a runner...

(c) 2011 Ms. Huis Herself at musenmutter.blogspot.com

I had a dream last night. A dream of running.
A dream of running, and it felt good.

It felt free.

In my dream, my husband and the girls and I were about to run a 5K. He was going to stick with them and I was going to Run.

Run far and fast and free.

Run with purpose and speed and lungs filled with air.

Air-filled lungs and winged feet.

In my dream, running felt good and right and powerful. I welcomed it - the challenge, the distance, the pace, the speed.

It just felt good.


Maybe, just maybe, I am becoming a Runner.

Saturday, November 05, 2011

NaBloPoMo #5 - Penguin's 1st Birthday Party Invite

(c) 2011 Ms. Huis Herself at musenmutter.blogspot.com

Penguin had her first invited-on-her-own birthday party today. This might call for more reflection time than I have available, as my parents are here, which means Mr. Kluges and I can have a Date Night!  Now, Penguin's been invited to birthday parties before, but they've been family friends and Pumpkin has been invited, too, and/or they've been ones for our whole family to attend.

This one was for a 4K classmate, one we don't really know.  Sure, I've volunteered twice in Penguin's classroom and attended one of her field trips, but Z is not a child Penguin usually mentions.  I was actually a bit hesitant to have her go, in large part because her grandparents are here, but Mr. Kluges convinced me that she was SO EXCITED and that it was only two hours and that it was her first as-her-own-individual birthday party invite that we should let her go.

She was, in fact, very excited.  Well, excited and a bit nervous.  She requested I stay.  I said I'd stay as long as she wanted me to, but that I'd ask her occasionally and leave when she was ready for me to go.  In fact, I kind of wanted to stay for at least a bit since we've never had a play date with them and make sure my instincts were happy with her being there.

Well, I did end up staying the whole time, even though she would have been fine on her own, and the family seemed very nice.  I was the only parent to stay the whole time, although two other moms did stay the first hour.  She would have been fine - she asked Z, the birthday girl, within the first 10 minutes where the bathroom was, in case she needed it, and used it within the first 30 on her own.  She played completely independently the whole time with her classmates (well, 9 classmates & Z's cousin, who mostly played with Z's brothers anyway). 

But it did make me realize she IS a big girl now.  She's got friends/classmates I don't know, and their parents I've not really met.  She has her own thing in 4K, which is great, but she is also still my little girl, who wants me to stick around for security...

...and I'm happy to do so, for as long as she needs me....

...which I do realize won't be long at all!

Thursday, November 03, 2011

NaBloPoMo #3 - Cheater, cheater, what-would-you-eater?!

(c) 2011 Ms. Huis Herself at musenmutter.blogspot.com

Hey, guess what? I've gotten so out of the habit of writing here that it's only Day #3 of National Blog Posting Month & I'm already struggling for ideas.  Man, good thing I'm doing this. :)

So I toodled over to the NaBloPoMo site and checked out their writing prompts.  Yesterday's caught my attention:
If you knew that whatever you ate next would be your last meal, what would you want it to be? 
 Hmmm... good question.  Also, in no way "this is what I had for lunch," right?

I'd have a big ol' tender grilled steak, or maybe some nice prime rib.  Definitely these asparagus!   Some big fat salty steak fries & a spinach salad with dried cranberries and slivered almonds.  A cheesy artichoke dip for an appetizer.  Something ooey and gooey and chocolate and warm for dessert, with real whipped cream. 


...you know, suddenly leftovers for supper tonight sounds really, really disappointing.


How about you?  What would YOU choose if you knew it was going to be your last meal? 

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

2010 Resolutions Reviewed

(c) 2011 Ms. Huis Herself at musenmutter.blogspot.com

Yeah, so, I DO know it's March... I just kinda never did get around to reviewing 2010's resolutions & making new ones. Well, now that I can sort of type with my no-longer-sausage-y fingers, let's just take care of that postponement, shall we?

My 2010 Resolutions focused on two areas: weight/exercise and tidyness/organizational/housekeeping.
  • Exercise most nights of the week - I was pretty good at this most of the year. Most weeks I had belly dance (and tap, too, for part of it), so I just had to run 2-3 times and/or do a DVD once & I was grand. C25K really helped with this one!!!
  • Do the Couch-to-5K Program...and run in a 5K race - I rocked this one by running in TWO! See?! Once my arm doesn't mind getting all jiggled and jounced around, I'm planning on getting back to this again, though there will definitely be a need to spend some weeks reconditioning!
  • Reduce/avoid empty calories - Ok, so I was more aware... but evenings are still a trouble time for me when you'll find me snacking/having a beer. That's probably why January 2011 weight was a mere 1 lb. less than my January 2010 weight. *sigh*
  • Keep following the Flylady - I did, and still am, and recommend her for motivation / encouragement / a (gentle) kick in the butt to just do 15 minutes 'cuz it really will help.
  • Spend 30 minutes per weekend on the attic room - I probably got this done about half the time. It got HOT up there in the summer, so sometimes then I did my half-hour in the lovely cool basement. Still, progress was made.
  • Paint the small area behind the radiator in our room (in the summer) - done! And it makes me smile whenever I notice it. Yay!
Ok, enough of that. Maybe I'll manage to get my 2011 goals finalized & up before the end of April, hey?

Sunday, November 28, 2010

NaBloPoMo #28 - Years

(c) 2010 Ms. Huis Herself at musenmutter.blogspot.com

We get our local paper on Friday, Saturday & Sunday. In them, they have a feature called "Special Moments," which is where they have all the engagement, wedding & anniversary pictures and such.

I love that this feature usually includes some milestone anniversaries - 40s, 50s, 60s, etc. I think marriages are dang hard work, and that is it lovely to recognize couples who have stuck it out so many years together. They have, most likely, dealt with challenges like children, health issues, empty nest, job issues, money concerns, and a whole host of other stressors.

And yet these couples are still together. Now, I'm not saying that every marriage is going to be one for the ages. Sometimes there are truly insurmountable issues, and the marriage dissolves... but I really think and hope that those can be the minority.

But what I really, really love - what keeps me searching out this feature week after week, paper after paper - is when those milestone anniversary notices include pictures. When they include photos both from today as well as from when they got married.

I love comparing those two pictures. Seeing in in the tilt of the head or the smile on the face how it really is the same person, even though separated by years and life experience. Sometimes the hairstyle is virtually identical. Sometimes the glasses are only minorly updated. Heck, sometimes the hair is gone completely, or the chins are doubled, or the years have really taken their toll.

But still, so many times, the love that was there in the early photograph, the love that showed through in the pride the couple took in each other, in the joy of their wedding, in the way they angled their bodies toward each other, is still there in the later pictures. They tilt their heads just a bit toward each other, they share a similar expression, or stand just as close as they used to, back when they were young.


In honor of all those couples, and their pictures, I'd like to say, "Happy Belated 10th Anniversary" to my own sweetheart, and an additional "Congratulations" to both our sets of parents on their 40th anniversaries this year.

And if you're lucky enough to have somebody with whom you'd like to share a picture 10, 20, 30, 50 years down the road, think of this the next time you're feeling the hard work part of marriage, and give him or her an extra kiss tonight.

Monday, August 02, 2010

7/12th of the Year Over Resolution Revisitation

(c) 2010 Ms. Huis Herself at musenmutter.blogspot.com

Doing a periodic check-in to keep myself honest & accountable... and also to celebrate the ones I've got DONE!!!
  • Exercise most nights of the week -Eh, I'm doing 3 consistently, sometimes 4 or 5. Now that I've run my 5K, I'm often ending up only running 2 times a week instead of 3. With belly dance troupe every Wednesday, I've always definitely got 3 nights in of some kind of exercise. I need to start doing something else once or twice a week - weights or the Shred or DVDs or something - because I've noticed a decline in arm strength since I just focused on running.
  • Do the Couch-to-5K Program...and run in a 5K race - Done, and DONE!
  • Reduce/avoid empty calories - Cheetos, I wish I knew how to quit you. Still working on this one, but all the summer veg around does help.
  • Keep following the Flylady- Fluttering along. Not doing everything, but with baby steps I'm definitely making progress. More decluttering needs doing, but the house is in general much more company-ready and clean than it was a year ago.
  • Spend 30 minutes per weekend on the attic room- I'm officially now adapting this one to be *Spend 30 minutes per weekend on the attic room OR the basement. It's really, really hot up there right now. And the basement gets just too chilly to want to spend much time in it in the winter. So, I'll split the difference & spend time in each, which is just fine. With people over or busy weekends or whatever, I'm probably getting doing this one 67% of the time, but that's still a lot more time spent on them than I ever have before & it helps a lot.
  • Paint the small area behind the radiator in our room (in the summer)- And DONE! As of about 10 days ago. I had to give it two coats, since it's hard to get a brush down in there behind it, but now it looks good! Yay!

Sunday, January 03, 2010

2009 Resolutions in Review

(c) 2009 Ms. Huis Herself at musenmutter.blogspot.com

Ok, yes, I AM going to be doing resolutions again this year. I just find it helpful to reflect & review on last year's first.

So, here are the old ones... I had three big ones:
  • To finish getting down to my goal weight and BMI of 24.
  • To get better at tidying up and cleaning.
  • To get rid of 365 things this year.
I totally rocked the second two. Thanks to a few recommendations, I started trying out the Flylady system and it made a WORLD of difference. I love her routines, & permission for "good enough" instead of (unreachable) perfection, and 5 (or 10 or 15) minutes can really make a difference. Following her routines, missions, and challenges has helped me tremendously with the tidying up, the cleaning, and the decluttering. If you are making something like this a goal, by all means, check out her website. It's all free, even though I find the website a bit difficult to navigate, and even if you only pick up a few habits, they can really make a difference. I'm totally sticking with her this next year for sure!

And as for getting rid fo 365 things, I did that by the end of September! Hip, hip, hooray! I kind of stopped keeping track after that in my sidebar chart, but I'm still gradually setting things aside for charity and/or my nephew and/or tossing things. I think doing this has really helped me realize the world will not end if I don't keep something, and that mental adjustment will really help me keep (gradually) going.


...and let's just not talk about that first one. Not only did I not meet it, well, I gave myself more to work with in terms of my 2010 resolutions, you might say. :P

Now, time to finalize my goals for 2010!

Friday, April 03, 2009

We're going to do what now?

(c) 2009 Ms. Huis Herself at musenmutter.blogspot.com

I'm done with my BD class through Park & Rec since we had our recital a couple of week ago. But, our instructor and a few of us who have had class for two years together have been meeting as a troupe for an hour after class. We work on more advanced moves, additional choreography, zills, etc. We're planning on continuing to meet on our Wednesday evenings throughout the summer.

However, rather rent the dance studio this month, and meet there since we wouldn't already be there for class, we decided to go to a drum circle in a nearby town and dance with them. (We do otherwise pay a reduced rate to rent the space for the hour after class is done.) Our instructor had attended it before, and the drum circle recently performed with a BD workshop that had been in town.

One slight problem, for/with me anyway...

...I don't dance in public.

"But, didn't you just do a dance recital?", you may be thinking. "Like, in a big auditorium for lots of people three different times?"

Well, yes, I did, but that wasn't "dancing," it was "performing." Completely different. We had a routine, we'd practiced (and practiced and practiced), I knew it looked cool, etc.

It's not that I mind being up in front of people. I don't in the least. I did speech tournaments for years in HS; I performed on stage in HS and college; I taught. Heck, I was even interviewed live for a local TC morning news show and (not live) on CNN about an new internet communication tool we were using in our school. (I was on the tech committee and it was the company pushing visibility for the product. They've since gone under, but if you search CNN by my maiden name, you'll find it.)

Those sorts of things - no problem. But DANCING? In front of PEOPLE?

Yeah, um, I think I've got something else to do that day. Maybe I'll just stand over here by the wall.

Seriously, dancing in front of other people terrifies me. At weddings, going out in college, even at this welcoming community drum circle, I'm just horribly uncomfortable with it.

And I know exactly why, not that that helps. I'm afraid of looking stupid.

I'm not good with failure or looking dumb or not doing something well in front of other people. Combine that with going to a very, very small school, where at dances everybody sat on the bleachers ('cuz dances were always in the gym) and laughed at how silly the people dancing looked. Add to the mix the fact that I'm not naturally a graceful person and, yeah, you get a formula nearly guaranteed to produce a wallflower.


But we went. And I did dance some. I also did a little drumming and a fair amount of zills towards the end.

Oh, was it ever outside my comfort zone. Even in a welcoming, supportive environment, with the rest of my troupe, it was just Not My Thing to dance in front of other people.


We're going again next week - in fact for the whole month. I know/hope that having done it once, it'll be easier next time, but yeah, I think I'll just have to chalk this experience up under "Expanding My Horizons" and "Challenge Yourself To Do Something You Think You Can't."