Tuesday, August 29, 2006

Emmy Thoughts

Ok, I'm writing this post while perusing photos from the Emmys, particularly from imdb.com. Now, I don't usually do much (any?) celebrity following, but I do like looking at the pretty clothes. Except sometimes, I'm really not sure who is telling the celebrities that what they're wearing looks good. Anyway, here's probably the girliest, most appearance-judgement-y post you're likely to ever get from me, hey?!

Doesn't Julia Louis-Dreyfus just look good enough to eat like a little ice cream sandwich? Yummy and cute?! Adorable!

Calista Flockhart, maybe nobody has ever told you, dear, but most women wear black because it looks slimming. You, my dear, should wear white... or something in neon... 'cuz you DO NOT need to look slimmer.

Heather Locklear. I got nothin' to say, except, what exactly are the clauses in your deal with the devil? Also, Morgan Fairchild... you are NOT that young, so either you've got good genes, a talented plastic surgeon, or a similar deal.

Evangeline Lilly, even if I didn't absolutely LOVE (with little hearts written all around it) Lost, I'd think your dress was classy and classic. And again...classy AND sexy.

Candace Bergen, just NO! No! No! Never listen again to the person who told you THAT looked good!!! I just... NO!

Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it possible that someone who probably weighs that little to actually look hippy? As in having big hips? 'Cuz you kinda do.

Um, Ben Kinsley, during arrivals...what are you up to, little Puck-man? 'Cuz that smile is totally like you're about to drag somebody down an elf hole there.

Ellen Pompeo, I like the dress, but the hairdo? Makes your ears look big. Like, as in pointy big. Like are you going to be helping Sir Ben with the elf hole, huh?

Virginia Madsen, I don't know who you are, but you sure have huge tracts of land!

Um, this one? I just don't even know what to say! (But I think you have too many teeth.)

And *sigh*, when did you get too old for me, Han Solo?

So, there. In summation, two thoughts. 1) It was sunny on the red carpet and that is not kind to a lot of the celebrities. 2) Dang, am I out of the loop! There were a TON of photos I was like "Huh? Who's that?" on.

So, I'm going to publish this because 1) it has enough links to be an Esoteric Guy post, and 2) I never say mean things about people, even if they are celebrities, but it's kind of fun this time!

(Also, I really need to go to bed because it's after 12:30 here... and that' s just unheard of.)

1 comment:

Kashka said...

I pretty much only watch the Emmys to remind myself that there isn't a man alive who isn't improved by the wearing of a tuxedo.

And I have no idea who that smiling person is. Chastity Bono? Cujo?